To journal or not to journal?

Just a short post to put forward my new breed of journal....

in the beginning

 I made the decision this week to give things a second chance, people, work, ideas, everything! Sometimes I write things off before I really know, I think I know but only fleetingly and not well enough to be really informed. I have to stay with things to really know, I have to not be influenced by others, not to judge by covers but give things/people the chance that they deserve to be given. I caught myself today going along with a general opinion and was gently reminded by my darling sister that I wasn't seeing for myself.

second chance 

I give 'things' a second chance all the time. I probably give too many things a second chance judging by the state of my spare room.
I've begun my new style of journal, almost finished actually. I'm not too sure sometimes I think my stuff looks too childish or fete-ish if that makes sense. Take a look and tell me what you think. Sorry if the pictures aren't great but I'm just starting out.

I've got stacks of ideas floating through this head of mine at the moment so hopefully I'm on a roll. Stay tuned for my light shade project that's screaming for attention.

It's been a long day, so good night, sweet dreams and if I don't catch you beforehand, have a fabulous weekend!

The week that was.....

It's done...I've delivered the presentation and lived to tell the tale. I have conquered my first real business hurdle and am feeling pretty chuffed with myself. That's not to say that I'm all business savvy now but I certainly have a better handle on it then I did 4 weeks ago. I have also met some great people and hopefully made some connections that will be around for a while. I'm now officially an Edgie and am very proud of that status. Check out the website to get a better idea of what I'm talking about - http://www.edgeware.com.au/

ta da!!!

It's been the week from hell and I'm very glad that it's over.... My 'other' workplace has imploded and I'm not sure what to do about that. I can't imagine returning and working in the new environment but I also know that I am constrained by the same things as everyone else, a mortgage, a family, eating, wearing clothes etc, etc! I think I need to get out of community work all together, it appears that they are all trying to move towards corporatisation and I'm not comfortable with that. I want to be part of something that nurtures the community it exists in, that is innovative and creative, not stuck in becoming a super-power that wants to take over the world. Who knows what lies ahead, I've been learning some interesting lessons lately although I'm not exactly sure what the learnings are yet. I'm sure time will tell, as it always does, if you are listening.

loyal european followers

Perhaps this is all about pushing me into forming this business that I keep talking about. This week has certainly encouraged me to give up on some things and get serious about others.

 I heard this on someone else's blog and can't get it out of my head so I thought that I'd pass it on...have a great week.x

Saturday session...

Sometimes I write things that don't really sound like me but I don't realise it until I've written quite a bit and then reread it. I just deleted 2 whole sentences that had me sounding like someone from a talk show. I know I do have a tendency to go on a bit but I am definitely not the talk show type (if you think otherwise please keep it to yourself). I absolutely hate talking in front of a group of people so talking in front of a tv audience is not something I ever want to do, ever, ever! Today I needed to talk in front of a group of likeminded people and discovered that even if the people were really nice, I still felt like my head and mouth all of a sudden turned to cotton wool. I usually sit down after speaking and can't recall clearly what I said and feel quite shaky and sweaty, this time was no exception. I have been told that I don't sound anywhere near as bad as I think but I reckon that's just to make me feel better and obviously that doesn't work because I don't believe them anyway!!!

scared of public speaking look...

I'm over the stress of it all now but have an underlying feeling of dread because I've got to do it again next week but in a more structured setting. blah, yuck, bugger, $#%^*! I have often thought of joining one of those public speaking groups like toastmasters but it's always just stayed as a thought and not an action. I can't see me working to overcome this in this lifetime but you never know life often has other plans.

goodbye summer...

I had a bit of a light bulb moment today that I'm still pondering as I type. I always think that I want to make stuff, (which is sometimes true) but in reality I also really love being instrumental in other people making things. I love to talk to people about what they do and I love all the bits and pieces that people use to make things eg. wood, fabric, old interesting things, paper etc, etc. I'm not completely sure but maybe I love that more than I love making things. I'm starting to think that I need to switch off the ideas part in brain and engage the doing part more seriously or else I'll never have started the thing that I really, really, really want to do.(can't at this moment really and truly identify what exactly that is but...)

freeze frame!

Work in progress..

Looking at this now I'm not sure what I think... I might go back to the drawing board! I've been trying to finish it for ages but the momentum is lost and with it the enthusiasm, or maybe it was the other way around. The truth is that it's my sisters birthday present from last year and I couldn't live with myself (or her) if I've not finished it before her birthday this year. The problem is it looked much better in my imagination but now???

I feel I've got to show this picture because it is of something that I have now finished. It's my new favourite everyday bag!

I'm going to try really hard to keep this blog happening because it reminds me that I want my life to be a certain way and that to do that I need to be committed to my dream and to stay passionate and focused. I'm a bit off track at the moment but feel a bit like I'm running beside where I want to be rather then it being something way ahead of me. If that makes any sense!??

It's all about me...........

Have kind of been avoiding posting this week, not sure exactly why but know for definitely, sure that I am. I'm constantly stunned how the subtle shifts and changes in my life have such a huge change in my motivation and diligence to do the things that I most want to do in the whole wide world. I think that I forget so easily that life is a series of gear changes and that things rarely go to plan but if you ride with it, and just hang on, that sometimes the ride is even more exciting then what you had planned. My dear friend Heather reminded quite a few times over our lovely, camping, adventure weekend that sometimes I need to let things go and not get sucked into the little things that appear huge because I am looking at them through my narrow tunnel vision lense and not my big picture lense. Mmmm thank goodness for dear friends.

Maybe today is a good day to remember all the wonderful things that I need to be thankful for. I am soooo lucky to have a beautiful, wonderful son that constantly surprises and delights me and is the 'English Student of the month for all the Year 8's' at his school. Yippee he really is gorgeous and smart it's not just mother bias.

I am also very grateful for my beautiful family that listen to my constant ramblings, build doors and fences for me, go camping with me, give me nieces and nephews to play with, their partners to love and admire, belief in myself when mine has all run out and a trillion other wondrous things.

Thank you to whoever thought up blogging so that I could ramble to my hearts content to no-one in particular and feel perfectly justified in doing it..........

Perhaps now would be a good time to stop with the procrastinating and actually make something!!!!